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Pfizer Pleased To Announce Their New Vaccine 90% Effective Against New Virus They Created

After the blockbuster revelations, the Babylon Bee right onto it: Babylon Bee. Satire, Pfizer.

Babylon BeeNEW YORK, NY — Pfizer Inc. dropped their new COVID variant and accompanying vaccine Thursday at midnight, much to the delight of CDC officials. The new vaccine is reportedly shown to be 90% effective against the COVID variant Pfizer created in their lab.

Experts suggest Pfizer’s radical approach to virus treatment may be tantamount to an abusive relationship, but that’s okay because we probably deserve it.

“I’d suggest we investigate this immediately,” said Congresswoman AOC. “But I don’t want to burn any bridges. I might have to get a job there someday.”

h/t John Connor II, David

PS: Huge congratulations to the indominatable Novak Djokovic, a man we discussed so much a year ago when he was deported for not taking drugs. See the raw emotion as he breaks down in the stands a few minutes after his win. It really is remarkable. It’s not just the vaccine debacle last year, but serious injuries in the last few weeks as well. The man is a champion who will not submit. Last year, they were afraid he would win and spread freedom, not viruses.

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